Who I Am, Is Who He Loves

I overthink, a lot. It doesn't matter the situation, I tend to over analyze. That sudden rush of senerios inside your head in which you wish you could shut off yet can't. Have you ever felt that?

When my boyfriend and I began to date, one of the very first things he said was, "You overthink. Calm down, everything is great." It didn't matter if it were a simple word, I would say to myself, "Oh was that too much? Oh my, what if I said too much. Did I sound insane?" The list of questions would ramble on and on in my mind.

My boyfriend and I were two years in of our friendship before we started to date. It began on the very day we hungout. In the years before we would keep in contact but never found time to meet. I was nineteen when we began to chat and twenty-one when when we first met in person. I was too stubborn to ask him to hangout first, I wanted him too. It was worth the wait because ever since that very day we became inseparable. Before him I couldn't even get a guy to take me out on a second date, they ran. In other cases I was like, yeah I don't think so and let them go that night.

It's quite funny looking back. I will remember this one thing forever, when I saw my partner at nineteen I knew he was mine. I even showed my friend a picture of him and said he's going to be my boyfriend. Come to figure out he actually is my soulmate.

He was never even into relationships until he saw me in person. I became his everything as he did for me. He is my one and my only. It didn't matter if I was overthinking or rambling on, he loves that about me, minus the overthinking. I learned those questions are my walls, ones I never even knew exsisted. They block that present moment from happening, you get so deep into your mind that you push away the good from your heart because you are afraid. We all been there. That's why my advice of the week fits perfect with this story; "Let yourself dream. Let yourself be. Let yourself free." What it means is, let yourself dream of a beautiful future, let yourself live in the present moment and let yourself free from all the past. It took me sometime and I am working on it, but I learned because who I am, is who he loves.